


Death is the End... Or the Beginning?

by TooGay4Dis



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Allergies, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Dark, Death, Gen, Hate Crimes, How Do I Tag, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Kuroshitsuji II | Black Butler II, Murder, Shinigami, Swearing, There Will Be Sadness, Trans Female Character, Trans Issues, Why Did I Write This?, i will add more tags, my interpretation on how they became shinigamis, set before the dispatch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-13
Updated: 2016-08-09
Packaged: 2018-07-23 16:13:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7470375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TooGay4Dis/pseuds/TooGay4Dis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My take on how the five reapers became death gods.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Disclaimer: In my fic, they don't have to commit suicide to become reapers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ronald

A young lad, no older than eighteen, stumbled his way through the Victorian London streets. It was dark now, the only light he had came from the moonlight and an occasional street lamp. Needless to say, he was a little drunk. Well, a lot, in fact.

He sighed, leaning against a brick wall, pushing his blonde hair out of his face and sweeping it to the side. He winced as he brushed past the large cut on his forehead from where he had been smashed into a table. He'd started a bar fight. Again.

It was an accident! He didn't mean for it to happen. In his drunken state, he had bumped into a guy and spilt his drink all over him.  I think his name was Larry or Lenny or somethin'  Ronald thought to himself. The man had been furious and punched him, and without thinking, Ronald had punched back, starting a huge brawl.

A large gust of wind blew and Ronald shivered. He pushed himself back off the wall, almost falling over a stray cat. He cursed quietly, picking up his pace, and decided he'd take the shortcut home through the backstreets.  Mum's gonna kill me. 

He cut through an alleyway, guiding himself round bins clumsily, until he heard footsteps behind him.

"Well, well, well." Came a deep voice. "Fancy seein' you here so soon." The man slurred.

Ron whipped his head around to be faced with the man at the bar, along with two people he didn't recognize. "H-hey, I don't want no trouble." He said, raising his hands up in surrender.

"Did ye' hear that, Boss?" Asked one of the men. "He don' want no trouble." He grinned.

"Well that's tough." The other man said. "Coz I do."

"Silence." The leader ordered. "You." He said, motioning to Ronald. "Do you have any idea who we are?" Ronald gulped and shook his head. "We're the fuckin' Mafia." He whispered. "And you ruined my favourite shirt."

Ron took a step back. The two men laughed loudly at him before getting out pocket knives.

"You were very rude to me." The leader said. "You didn't even apologize. Nobody teach ya to respect your elders, kid? Well, no matter." He said as he took out his own knife, a large dagger with an unknown Mafia symbol engraved into it. "We'll teach you a lesson." He smirked. He turned back to his colleagues, nodding to them.

"N-no, wait!" Ronald cried. "I-I'm sorry! I didn't know who you were!"

The leader just tutted. "Too late for that, kid. You ruined our reputation in that bar, nobody gets away with that. Go on, boys."

The two men stepped forward, easily cornering Ronald. Ronald's eyes were wide as his back hit the wall. He was frozen in place.

"Grab him." The smaller of the two yelled. The other did not have to be told twice. He lunged at the two-toned boy, grabbing his arms and pulling them behind his back. Ronald yelped, trying to shake himself free of his captors. "Shut him up!" A hand came across Ron's mouth and he bit at it, the man yelped in pain. He kicked the man in the stomach and tried to make a run for it but the smaller man grabbed him forcefully and punched him hard in the jaw.

The taller man got up from the floor and glared at Ron. He gulped. "You little shit!" He spat before forcefully grabbing his hair. The smaller man ripped at Ron's shirt, using the fabric as a makeshift gag. Ronald screamed from behind the gag, tears springing out of his eyes.

"Now now, boys. You've had your fun." The leader said in a commanding tone.

"Aw but Boss, we were just gettin' started!" The smaller man whined.

"I said enough!" The leader snapped. "He is  mine!  You got that?"

The smaller man gulped and nodded.

"Now, where were we?" The leader continued. "Ah, yes." He brought up his dagger, the metal flashing dangerously in the moonlight. Ronald struggled, trying to break free from his captors but with no success. The man brought the dagger up to Ron's chest, slicing the metal slowly over his skin. Blood instantly pooled from the wound and tears sprang out of Ron's eyes as he wailed in pain and confusion.

Why is this happenin' to me? Where am I? Somebody help me... 

The leader laughed at Ronald's obvious pain and distress. "You stupid boy." He whispered. "After this, nobody will question me again. To think I let a  bar brawl  bring down my name. To think I almost let some  kid  make a fool out of me." He studied the blood at the end of his dagger. "No. After this, nobody will even utter your name."

Ronald's eyes widened as the leader raised the dagger up once more and stabbed him in the abdomen. It wasn't enough to kill him and the man knew that, he wanted the boy to suffer. Ron's vision flashed white as a searing pain ripped itself through his body. He didn't even have a chance to cry out when he was roughly thrown to the floor by the two men holding him.

Ron lay convulsing on the cold cobbled ground and the leader looked down at him. "Such a pity." He said but there was no remorse in his tone or in his eyes. "Take the gag and go." He ordered to the two men. The men nodded, taking the gag off Ron before handing it to the leader.

"Wha' are ya gonna do with that, Boss?"

"We need evidence that we killed the boy." The leader said calmly. "Then nobody will even think to believe that this kid could get away with tarnishing my name."

The men nodded and looked back down to Ronald. His breaths were coming out short and fast and there was blood in the corners of his mouth. The men both grinned and kicked him harshly before leaving. Ron tried to protect himself from the blows but was unsuccessful.

He watched as the three men left him alone in the alleyway. He couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. He was losing blood quickly and he tried to sit up. He cried out loudly as his wound protested and he coughed up blood. He lay back down, hoping, praying, that someone would find him in time. Black spots danced in his vision and he was scarcely aware that he was losing consciousness. He let out a short, shuddered breath before everything faded to black.

~*~

Grell Sutcliff looked at her ledger for this evening. It was her last reap of the day and she was looking forward to clocking out and having a nice hot bath. The soul needed to be collected in the next five minutes and she huffed as she read over the name.

Ronald Knox 

Age 18 

Killed by a dagger to the abdomen and dies due to loss of blood. 

Grell tutted. The world was cruel. However, Shinigami were meant to be emotionless on the job so she quickly closed her ledger shut before running over the rooftops of London, her silhouette dark against the moonlight.

By the time she reached the boy, he was already dead. Luckily, nobody had taken his soul before she had a chance to reap him. She sighed as she looked over the boy's features.  He was really young.  Grell frowned, her maternal instinct taking over. She ran her hand over Ronald's cheek and brushed a stray hair from his eyes. His mouth was set at a small pout and his eyebrows were knitted together in pain.

Grell now had two options. She couldn't let Ronald live, it was too late for that. She could either collect his soul and let him slowly rot in the Library, or she could turn him into a reaper.

Usually, the latter option was discouraged but she couldn't help thinking that maybe it would be a good idea? The London Branch were severely understaffed; and there was something about this boy that Grell thought would make him a valuable asset to the team. Grell knew a hunch was not going to be good enough to justify her actions, but she didn't care. She  knew  this would be the right thing to do.

So, instead of reaping the soul, she took Ronald's body back to the Shinigami Realm. To say William was furious would be an understatement.

"You can't just bring back humans without permission!" He bellowed at her in his office.

"I know, I know! But there's just something about him that I know will be useful."

"And what is that?"

Grell sighed. "I don't know. But just trust me on this, okay?"

"Just  trust  you? Grell, that isn't good enough!"

"William, please!" Grell pleaded, tears filling in her eyes.

Will sighed. "Honestly..." He muttered. "Alright Sutcliff. It's not like I have much of a choice anyway, you already brought him here. He will be trained in the ways of a Shinigami."

Grell smiled. "Oh William~! Thank-"

" But, " William interrupted. "Since you brought him here, he is  your  responsibility. You will mentor him- if he graduates."

Grell sighed. Will knew she didn't play nice with others. But she had to do this. There was something about the boy, something she couldn't place, and she needed to know what that was.

~*~

"Ronald Knox." Came a stern voice. Ron groaned as bright light hit his closed eyelids. "Welcome to the Shinigami Dispatch Association. You will be trained in the ways of a Shinigami. Do you have any objections?"

Ron slowly opened his eyes. "W-where am I?" He stuttered.

The person behind him sighed. "Honestly, I just told you."

Ronald turned to the voice to see a man with sleek black hair and spectacles staring back at him with an irritated expression. Even with that expression, Ron thought he was the most beautiful person he had laid eyes on, even if his face was slightly blurry.

"You are in the afterlife." The man said. "My name is William T Spears and I am the head of the department. You are here to collect souls for Judgement Day. That is your new purpose."

"Why can't I see?" Asked Ron.

Will picked up a pair of glasses from the bedside table and handed them to him. He put them on his face and the world became clear again. He noticed he was in some sort of hospital room, and Ron could barely hold in his gasp at the clear sight of the man in front of him.

"These are your trainee spectacles. You will wear these from now on." William said. "Now come with me."

Ronald nodded and followed the other Shinigami from the room. It was that action that changed his life forever.


	2. Grell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She just wanted to be accepted.

She walked quickly down the cobbled streets of London, her shoulder length red hair blowing behind her from the wind. She sniffled quietly as her shoes echoed off the empty streets. The past few hour's event played over and over in her mind.

"Father! Father please!" She cried, grabbing hold of the man's arm desperately. 

"No!" He yelled, roughly pulling his arm away from her. "I have a SON, god damn it! You will not disgrace our family name! You're no daughter of mine, now get out!" He screamed, face red with anger, veins forming on his forehead, eyes blazing with fury. 

"Where am I supposed to go?" She shouted, tears streaming down her face. "I didn't ask for this! I don't want this! I'm a lady!" 

SMACK! 

"I will not have my SON say such things! You are a MAN!" He screamed. "And you are no son of mine. You have disgraced this family. Look at you, in that dress. Faggot. Get out." 

His words were like a physical punch to her chest. She left the house she grew up in, numbed. And now here she was. Alone in the dark London streets. Afraid. Her father had cast her off, not caring what happened to her now. She had no money, no friends and no prospects. She was still in her dress that was now ripped from her father trying to pull it off.

There was a wolf whistle from behind her. She froze.

"Hey sexy lady!" Someone slurred. She didn't turn around. "Look at 'er lads! She's all alone. Shouldn't let a lady walk alone. Lotsa nasty folk about. 'Int that right?" He sneered.

"Lord knows what someone would do ta someone like 'er." Another commented.

"Bad things." Another added. She could hear the smile in his voice.

Her breath quickened, as did her pace as she tried to find somewhere she would be safe. There was nowhere. For the first time in her life, she wished these people knew that she was born male. She was scared. Terrified. She knew what happened to women on London streets late at night.

"Hey! Where ya off to, pretty lady? Get 'er lads!"

She let out a shriek as she was grabbed from all angles.

"Hmmm, not much of a chest, but she'll do, I suppose." One man said crudely and leered at her. She grimaced and backed away. She hated feeling so powerless. She had nothing to defend herself with. No weapon. Nothing powerful at all. Oh, how she wished she could rip these guys to pieces for just touching her. Her sadness had now been replaced with full blown fury as she kicked out at her attackers.

Her fight was to no avail, however, as she was dragged into a nearby alley. The men began ripping at her clothes, exposing her completely.

"What the-"

"What the  fuck  is this?!"

"Fucking fag!"

"We nearly shagged it!"

She closed her eyes tightly. She knew what was coming.

"Kill him."

Everything moved in a blur as she was thrown roughly into a wall. She was brought back to reality by a sharp pain in her stomach where someone had stabbed her with a pocket knife. Her body was stabbed several more times before she was thrown roughly to the floor. She let out silent screams, begging for it to end.

Part of her wanted to give up, to let them win. But there was one part in the back of her mind that wanted to seek revenge on these bastards. She was angry.

I will not let this be the end of me. 

~*~

"Ooooh! Look what we 'ave here! A beautiful red rose!" A cockney accent spoke.

She blearily opened her eyes but found she couldn't focus on anything.

"Here you are, Dearie." The voice spoke again, leaning over and placing a pair of spectacles on her face. "There." He giggled.

The world became clear again and she turned towards the voice. A man stood next to her sporting a black hat and robes and he had extremely long, silver hair. She intantly questioned his sanity.

"My, my, my, you are a pretty one!" He exclaimed. "Grell Sutcliff, welcome to the Shinigami Dispatch Society!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, little cameo from Undertaker, I couldn't help it!


	3. William

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As a human, William was an extreme party animal. Drinks, drugs and sex. But alas, it couldn't last. Something was bound to go wrong eventually.

William T Spears sighed as he heard another one of his father's infamous speeches.

"You are an adult now, William." The balding adult scolded. "You cannot keep going to parties and fraternising with people! You need to take responsibility for yourself and focus on your work."

Will was standing in his father's living room in the town house he had been brought up in. The Spears Family were quite well off, owning a small business that was doing well for itself- a business that Will's father was hoping Will would come a part of. Not that William had that much of a choice.

"I think it's time you learn to become more of an adult." William's father continued. "I shall find you a wife. No more parties." His father's voice held strict authority.

Will's blood ran cold. He couldn't marry a woman! There was one thing that William's father did not know about. These  parties  well... they were held at gay clubs.

From a young age, William had never been interested in women in the slightest. He didn't know why at the time, but as he got older, he realized his sexuality and had frantically tried to hide it. That was until he met a man named Edward. He was tall, handsome and had the brightest blue eyes Will had ever seen. He found out that Edward was also gay and that there were secret gay parties held in clubs disguised as warehouses. That was where the partying had started.

"F-father I-"

"There will be no arguing on this matter." His father interrupted. "I am going to find you a wife and that's final. Now get yourself cleaned up this instant!"

William nodded and hung his head, exiting the room.

~*~

It had been three months since their discussion in the living room and William was currently in town with a very pretty girl with the name of Vanessa- his soon to be wife. His father was delighted with her. She was polite, she had a good social status and she was extremely beautiful with long blonde hair flowing down her back, large green eyes and long lashes.

William had been very kind to her and treated her with the utmost respect and dignity. The partying had stopped and he felt isolated once again. He had seen Edward in town a few times and it had almost shattered his heart at the betrayed and confused look he was given from the blue eyed man.

The pair were going to see Vanessa's father, Cedrick. He was a stern man with a large gut and next to no manners. William was extremely surprised that Vanessa was even related to him. They were polar opposites.

William opened the door to the large town house and held it open for his fiancée. She smiled at him and stepped inside with the grace of a princess.

She is very stunning.  Will thought to himself.  Maybe I could learn to love her? 

In the back of his mind, he knew that wasn't possible, but what choice did he have?

"Ah! There you are!" Cedrick exclaimed with a mouthful of chicken. "How are the wedding plans?"

"They are coming along nicely, Sir." William said softly.

"What? Speak up, boy!"

"He said they are coming along beautifully, father." Vanessa said with a smile, locking arms with her husband to be. Vanessa had no idea about Will's  predicament  and she was really taken with him. Will couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

He needed to get out of the house- just for a few minutes. He couldn't stand her looking at him like that.

"I'm going to go and get you some flowers." He whispered to her, smiling gently. Her eyes lit up.

"Thank you, William! I know they are going to be beautiful!"

"Not as beautiful as you, my dear." He replied, kissing her cheek and acting out his role as convincingly as he could.

He quickly exited the town house, heading towards the small flower shop at the corner of the street. He decided to pick some bright pink tulips as they seemed just as delicate as her.

After paying for his bouquet, he left the shop and headed back towards the house. As he turned the corner, he felt himself crash into someone.

"Oh! I'm sorry!" The man exclaimed.

William looked up. It was Edward.

"I wasn't looking where I was going," The man continued. "I-" He stopped. "William?"

"Edward." Will breathed, looking into those blue eyes he'd missed so much.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was buying flowers for my..." He trailed off, an uncomfortable expression on his face.

"Oh." Edward said stiffly. "I see."

"Eddie..."

"You don't have to explain yourself to me." He said quickly. "We knew it could never last."

"But I miss you." Will whispered, eyes glassy.

Edward sighed. "I missed you too." He admitted.

"I hate this! I don't want to marry her! I- I fucking love you!"

Edward took hold of Will's cheek, softly. "And I you. I wish it didn't have to be this way."

"Me too." Will said, pressing his forehead to Edward's.

Edward leaned in, kissing him softly on the cheek. Will turned Edward's head and kissed him on the lips, wrapping his arms around his neck.

BANG! 

There was silence. Will looked to Edward, confused.

Edward's eyes were wide as he pulled his lips away from Will's. He gasped, his lips parting softly and blood flowed out, getting on Will's hand.

"E-Eddie?"

Edward stumbled backwards. Will's breath hitched.

"Gay scum." A voice said from behind Edward.

Edward's legs buckled and he fell to his knees. Will grabbed under his arms to stop him from falling, looking deeply in to his love's terrified eyes. A tear trailed down Edward's cheek, mixing in with the blood coming from his mouth.

"Oh my god." Will breathed as Edward's eyes slipped shut. "Edward?! Eddie?! Eddie no!" He cried, running his hands through Edward's mousey hair. Will began to sob, shaking Edward in hopes of waking him.

This is a nightmare, this is a nightmare. It has to be! 

Edward's eyes still remained shut and the tear continued to make it's way down the youth's face. Will screamed, tears ripping themselves out of his eyes and onto his lover's now lifeless body. He pulled Edward closer to him, crying into his hair.

"You bastard!" He screamed, finally looking at his attacker.

Cedrick chuckled. "I knew there was something wrong with you right from the start. But my dear 'Ness was taken with you so I didn't object. After all, you do come from a good family. But now I see that you're just a fag. That kid deserved to die! As do you!"

Will snarled, looking up at Cedrick with cold eyes. He looked back down to Edward, stroking his hair lightly. "I'm sorry." He whispered before unsteadily getting to his feet.

Cedrick smirked. "What are you gonna do?"

"Nothing." Will whispered, a small tear rolling down his cheek. "Nothing."

Cedrick shrugged. "Easier for me, then. The fact that I let you anywhere near by daughter is actually sickening." He cocked his gun. "I'm going to rid the world of all the gay scum. First I started with your boyfriend, now I end with you." He smiled, pulling the trigger.

~*~

William's eyes opened slowly and he groaned. When his eyes adjusted, he was met with very blurry white walls and a very blurry figure.  Was he wearing robes? 

"Well 'ello there, dear William!" A voice exclaimed. "M'name's Undertaker. Welcome to the afterlife!" He giggled, placing a pair of spectacles onto his face. "Wear these at all times and you'll be dandy!"

Will looked around the room. "Where am I? What happened?"

"You're in the Dispatch, dearie! And you truly don't remember?"

Will's brow furrowed as he tried to look back at the previous events. The memories came in a rush and he gasped quietly, tears forming in his eyes.

No. No. I won't let them fall. Father was right. If I hadn't of gone to those parties, Edward would still be here. I'd still be alive. If I would've been responsible, none of this would have happened. Get a hold of yourself, Spears. No more crying. This is your chance at a new life. From now on, no more parties. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think it's kinda sad that that's how Will became so stoic. :( Please leave a comment if you liked it and I'll see you soon! Alan and Eric are next! :o


End file.
